This paradox — that my kink is simultaneously intimate and asexual — is certainly one of its many irritating and interesting aspects. Possibly I’d been therefore uncomfortable with my sex for such a long time that scenes with two guys, where there clearly wasn’t a stand-in that is obvious “me, ” were much easier to consume. Possibly I’ll never ever grasp. My kink developed early. As a young kid, we pored over any book that mentioned spanking, paddling or thrashing.…